We All Do Something Stupid

It's true. And as much as I hate to admit it, I'm going to tell you something stupid I did.

12 years ago, I was dating this guy (let's call him Zeke). I was dating Zeke, really, for only 3 months. But we "knew" it was love. (Ahem.)

About 2 months in, we, meaning my sister and I, decided to let Zeke move in with us. So there we were, the three of us, sharing an apartment. We made dinner together, we watched the planes crash into the towers together and Zeke and I tried to buy a dog together. He REALLY wanted a dog. We went to every pet store we could find, trying to finance a dog.

STUPID THING #1: When you can barely afford rent and groceries, there is no real reason to add debt onto that, especially by financing a living thing that you have to provide for.

Thankfully, we both had bad enough credit that we couldn't get a dog.

Fast forward to September 28th, 2001. Zeke leaves. He doesn't want to be with me anymore. And I am heartbroken. Long story short, he turned out to be playing me for a fool. And I fell for it.

STUPID THING #2: Letting stupid Zeke play me for a fool. I was so desperate for someone to love me that I let the first person who showed me attention have my heart. Classic Vlad.

But wait! Remember that he wanted a dog? Holy cow! Maybe he'll come back if I get a dog! So what do my sister and I do?

STUPID THING #3: My sister and I visited the pound. We left with a 1 year-old female doggie, with hopes that this would bring Zeke back. Really.

Did Zeke come back? Yes, but only to get his things. I never saw him again. I ended up moving in with my grandparents, leaving this sweet doggie with my sister....who later brought this sweet doggie to my mom's house until my sister "could find a place with a yard". My mom never gave her back.

Hence, the moral of this story: We all do stupid things. BUT, those stupid things can swing back around to bring about something good.

Today, that sweet doggie, our sweet Panda took her last sleep. Because of that stupid Zeke, Panda entered our lives. I have so many good and funny memories of her; she was my mom's first doggie after our Crockett went to sleep.

My throat is clenching. Piper keeps patting me on the back. I know my contact is going to blink out of my eye over and over again. It is hard to imagine visiting my mom's house without Panda being there. She was never really friendly around the littles, but I did get the rare shot of a child laying on her the last time we were there (and of course, it was Scarlet the Firecracker).

Panda Bear....I don't know what you were thinking or what you were feeling, but I'm glad Mom's face was the last one you saw. She loved you very much, as did all of us sisters. You were a good doggie and we will miss you oh so much.

 

Good girl, Panda, good girl.