Thoughts on Christmas

Since Christmas is pretty much a few days away, I get to thinking about Christmases I had growing up.


Me and my sisters would go to sleep in someone's room (usually Courtney's) and wake up around 4:30 AM. No kidding...we had this insane internal alarm clock that would "boing" us wide awake that stinkin' early on Christmas morning. Of course, we'd either yell or knock on my mom's wall to ask if we could come out yet.


The answer was no.
And it was still no at 5.
And still no at 5:30.
Finally somewhere between 6 and 6:30, we'd hear my mom's bedroom door open and eventually the Christmas music would begin playing. 


Hence, the tradition began: there was Christmas music playing, the smell of coffee cake in the oven; our Christmas tree was lit up and sometimes there was a video camera handy. If we happened to go outside, those Christmas lights were lit too.


We'd see our Santa gifts, left out and unwrapped. Somehow, we always knew which present belonged to which sister. We'd ooh and ahh over each other's gifts; then the wrapping paper explosion would occur. One of us would be designated to hand out the gifts, making sure that everyone had theirs. Mom would sit back and watch us, occasionally opening a gift of her own.


I always felt bad that Mom didn't have a bunch of presents to open, but now I know that she didn't care. Just as I don't care about the amount of presents I will be getting. She savored the moments, watching us widen our eyes and scream with joy. It was the best gift of all.


Now that my girls are getting older, the joy of watching them on Christmas morning is what I am anxiously awaiting. To see them open THEIR gifts and to see their reactions. Maybe we don't have the exact same traditions as I did growing up, but there will still be Christmas music playing and our tree will be lit up. Their Santa gifts will be out, but wrapped and in their special "Santa Bag". Maybe I'll make some coffee cake, maybe I won't. 

And wouldn't you know that I have tears in my eyes right now. (Sissy or Female? You pick.)


I won't ever be that little kid again, anxious for Santa to come. I'm grown up now. And Piper? It saddens me to realize that the crystal illusion of Santa is really only for a few years. A few precious years where she will REALLY believe in him and have no doubt that he is real. This is probably the first year where she is understanding what is happening. And by the time she is 8 or 9, it will all be gone.


Such mixed emotions. I really am a chick, aren't I?