Can It Be?

I'm so excited that for the first time EVER, Samantha is sleeping in a big girl bed (a.k.a. the bottom bunk in Piper's room). And she did it all by herself.

I was going to put her in the crib yet again because every time we've tried to have her sleep on the big bed, she would come out crying, pointing to the crib, saying "Bed? Bed?" through her nuk (pacifier, for those of you who do not know the special words we use around here). But this time, it was different.

I had unintentionally let them stay up a wee bit later than normal (my excitement for the previous projects mentioned here). We brushed teeth, we read two stories, we said our prayers. Piper climbs up into her bed. I ask Sam if she wants her nuk and what does she do? She points to the bottom bunk and says, "Bed? Bed?" Okay, I'll oblige. I told her to climb into bed (which has a brand new comforter and pillowcase on it, courtesy of my redecorating/hormonal/crazy-pregnant-lady-semi-nesting phase) and I grabbed her nuk and favorite blanket. She gets under the blankets, gets all snuggly and that's it.

Of course, 30 minutes later, I can hear Piper talking to Sam. She's giving Sam every stuffed animal out of the stuffed animal basket. Stern warnings and hugs are dealt. Hall light is out.

30 MORE minutes later, I can hear Piper talking again and Sam crying. I have no idea what Piper was doing because she was climbing up to her bed as fast as she could...kind of like a monkey. THIS time, a spanking was followed with another stern warning. I tuck both of them back in and warn them that if I have to come back there again, there's going to be big trouble. (This is where all of you say (sarcastically, of course), "Oooh...big trouble...we're really scared now.")

But what is this? Can it be? 30 minutes later, I don't hear anything at all. I'm afraid to actually peek my head in. But there they are, asleep in their own beds and Sam is still peacefully sleeping on the big girl bed.

So, instead of being excited like I was earlier, I'm sad. Is Samantha really growing up? But, she's my baby! My little girl. My sweet Samanti. I'm not ready for her to sleep in a big girl bed.

Yah, yah, I know...I have a baby that's about to pop out and will need the crib sooner than later. I should be happy that Sam is transitioning without too much drama. And believe me, I'm grateful. Really, I am. I just can't get over the fact that she's getting so big.

For tonight, I will allow myself a small cry, just like I did before Samantha was born and I was feeling bad that Piper wasn't going to get all my attention anymore. It's kind of the same thing. That Sam isn't going to be my baby anymore, but my middle child. That she is growing up and there's nothing I can do to stop it.

And I love her. I can cry for that, at least.